Thrifting is My Cardio

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I love thrifting. Buying good quality clothes at discounted prices, sign me up. I feel just like Macklemore in his "Thrift Store" video when I find something great- I too be popping tags. I have been thrifting since before it became a "thing", almost ashamed of being caught at a second hand store. But, times have definitely changed and mother has bills.

I mostly thrift for my kids because they grow out of their clothes at such an exponential rate. It's even better when you shop at a consignment store that will buy back your old clothes and give you a store credit (or cash). Last school year I was able to buy both my kids 3 outfits each and I only had to come out of my pocket about $20.

I thrift for myself whenever I need a particular clothing item to complete a look. For instance, my church choir doesn't wear robes so we choose a different uniform that we will wear each time we sing. I don't always have the complete look hanging in my closet, so for those items, thriftying becomes my best friend. Just in the last couple months I have had to obtain the following items: a bow tie, a blue dress, khaki pants, a purple top and a blue blazer. I don't think I paid over $3 for any of those items.

The only thing about thrifting is that you have to have time to shop. Whether the clothes are hung up or in a bin, you have to take your time to find want you want, and they may not even have your size. And speaking of size, you have to be realistic about your needs. If you wear a 12- buy a 12, or maybe even a 14 because these are gently used clothes and they have been washed and possibly shrunken. And depending on the stores' policy, you just may be stuck with the item. I bought a pain of silky pants that claimed to be a size above mine and I thought I would be able to turn them into harem pants. My thighs however, didn't cooperate so they are now pajama bottoms.

So, here are my top 3 thrift stores in the Southeastern Michigan area:
1. Once Upon a Child (multiple locations- Nation Wide)- They carry clothes, shoes, toys, books and equipment for kids from newborn to size 10 in boys. They are also a consignment store and buy gently used clothes. They are very choosy with what they except- no off brands, faded clothes, holes, etc.
2. Value World (multiple locations- Nation Wide)- Carrying kids, women and men's clothing, household goods, toys, accessories and shoes, the stores are huge and you can get a whole outfit for about $10- $15. But, buyer beware, look for missing buttons, undone hems and the like as their clothes are donated.
3. Thrift on the Ave- This resale/ consignment store is so classy and cute, located in the Midtown area in Detroit. I found them on Instagram and was hooked after I went to a clothing swap they hosted a couple months ago.

Thrift stores I have yet to enjoy:
1. Goodwill (multiple locations- Nation Wide)- I've heard good things about Goodwill (especially the one in Dearborn), so I can't wait until I can get my cardio on and get some great finds. Goodwill Industries has been around for a long time and has done a lot for our communities.
2. Hips (2 locations in Michigan)- Geared for the plus sized woman, I pass by Hips everyday on my morning commute and want to see what kind of clothes they have.
3. Whoo U R Upscale Resale For a Cause- Located in Rochester, I found this store during an Internet search and they seem to have a lot of high quality merchandise. I just hope the high quality product doesn't equal high price. I'll let you know, though as I plan to hit up each one before the summer's out.

Where's your favorite place for resale? If you need help finding a resale store in your area, you should check out thethriftshopper.com. Let me know if you discover some good finds.

Forever loving my B.A.D.D. kids,
Rhonda

Ain't nobody got time for stress

Hey y'all I'm back! I had to take a pause for the cause since stress had been wearing me down. Life has it's stressful moments - I'm a wife, mother, work full time, sing in the choir, do make up and hair on the side and I try to fit my love of writing in there somewhere, not to mention some tiny health issues that slowed me down. I'm exhausted at just typing that out.

But, I'm learning how to deal by taking plenty of breaks along the way. I will admit it has been hard to do. I knew it was time to do so when I was cooking the other day and just could not get it together. My mind was on 10,000 and my body was just all over the place- I dropped raw hamburger meat in dishwater and dropped an egg on the floor. I was tempted to throw my hands up and go get take out, but we were under a winter advisory so I just put my big girl panties on and continued cooking my meal.

When I'm stressed I feel it all throughout my body. I have to loosen my shoulders, which are usually up to my ears by the end of the day. And there are times that my jaws are clenched so tight I have to stop and do jaw movements. But what's a girl to do?

That being said, here are 5 simple things that I do that help me de-stress, even if it's only for a brief moment.

1. Take a bubble bath. The "Calgon take me away" lady knew what she was talking about. A nice, calming bath with soft music playing may be just the mini-vacation (or for some the only vacation) you need. I go all out with mine, candles, music and sometimes wine if it's been that type of day.

2. Do some yoga and breathe. Like I said, I feel stress all throughout my body, so taking some nice deep breaths and stretching those muscles out makes me feel rejuvenated after a long day's work. Or, you can just lay out on the floor for 20 minutes and tell your family you're in corpse pose.

3. Take an hour back. Sometimes I just reclaim my life as my own and I choose to do whatever I want to do for one hour. Whether it's turning up my music and dancing in my room, watching a show via Netflix or faux-shopping on the Internet (that's where I put all the stuff I want in my cart without actually confirming the purchase.) Don't judge me, I'm on a budget.

4. Read a magazine. I would love to say read a book, but let's keep it real, we ain't got time for that. But, flipping through a magazine, looking at the latest makeup and clothing trends makes me happy and I often find inspiration for shopping my closet or a new product I want to try.

5. Mini facial or makeover. I used to give myself a facial every week. Unfortunately, those facials have become few and far between. But, when I need to de-stress I pull out my scrubs and masks and get to work. Or, I play dress up and beat my face for an event that may or may not be happening in the near future.

How do you de-stress? Maybe I can add it to my routine. 

Wishing you Love, Peace and Soul Deep Beauty!

I can't keep up.

My children keep me busy and they are barely into grade school. My son is in kindergarten while my daughter is in day care, preparing to go to pre-school in the fall. Every couple of weeks I get letters and calendars from both of their teachers letting me know what type of events they have coming up. Yes, it's March and I should have the hang of all this by now, but for some reason I can't keep up with all the pajama days and school spirit days. I feel so bad when I go to drop my child off and everyone else is dressed up but them.

My first instinct was to blame my husband because he fixes their lunch and gets them dressed in the morning, but as my mama and Dr. Phil would tell me, it's not fair blaming him cause it takes two. But, when a teacher asked me "Ohh, you didn't know it was green day?" I could feel the guilt and the blame well up inside me. I work a full time job and run a side business that keeps my week-ends locked up so yes, I forget to look at the calendar and see that green is the color of the day. Are my kids clean? Yes. Are they fed? Yes. Are they healthy and happy? Yes and Yes. That's my priority, but I know that they don't see it that way.

So what do you do when you are so busy? You plan ahead. On Sunday night I look at the upcoming week and plan accordingly. (At least that's the plan.) I had tried waiting the night before, but that just puts me in rush mode. Case in point. I went to a business expo and my husband was at home allllll day. My son's school had been doing a reading month celebration and that week was kind of dedicated to Dr. Seuss and the next day was dress up as your favorite Dr. Seuss character. When I got home I asked my husband if he knew what our son was going to dress up as. He had no clue. Mind you, it's 7:30 pm. (Dr. Phil, are you absolutely sure this isn't his fault?) So, I go into supermom mode and put my thinking cap on. Maybe you can run to Toy's R' Us and get a Cat in the Hat hat. But, how much is that gonna cost, we're on a budget. Then he asked our son what his favorite character was? Thing One from Cat in the Hat, he said and the light bulb went off in my head.

I sent my husband out to the store and I told him to bring me some blue hairspray and the biggest can of holding spray he could find. I wrote on a piece of paper and pinned it to a red shirt and I totally destroyed a wig of mine (now that's love). The blue hairspray looked more like purple so I had to mix some acrylic paints that I had to create the perfect blue. I put the wig in front of a fan overnight and below was his costume for the day.

As you can see, he loved it and I was happy to make him happy. I never want to make him or his sister feel out of place and lets face it, some kids are mean. Can I keep up with all of the different dress up days and school functions? Probably not, but I'll give it the old college try.

What do you do to keep up with your kid's schedule?

In need of a personal retreat

I need to take a break. A day, a full 24 hours to myself. No husband, no kids, no work, no business, no phone calls, no email, no drama. No cooking, no cleaning, no fussing, no stressing, no planning, no lists. Just me, my music, some good food, ice cream, a couple of good movies, magazines and a good book (something real juicy). I might even take my husband's game (if I can pry it out of his hands) and play Dance Central all night. Ohh, and my karaoke machine and ...wait, I might need two days.

I am often told that I don't know how to relax. I have always tried to be supermom, and I have the Halloween pics to prove it. But, the stress has left me emotionally, spiritually and physically exhausted. And I realize that I'm married and I should "share the wealth" as far as responsibilities go, but I'll be the first to admit that I am a control freak and I want things done when I want it and how I want it. Don't judge me.

So I'm thinking that there is no way that I can go on this little "retreat" in my own home. Why? Because it's just not possible. Even if I can manage to send the hubby and kids off to do something for a day, I still won't be able to do something non-house related. There is always something to clean and I just can't concentrate sometimes. I will definitely be getting a room for a night.

The thing that really opened my eyes to needing this mini time out is while I was watching Oprah's Lifeclass, which has been the best free therapy I could have received. On this particular episode they talked about how people need to slow down, because they are on autopilot and not only missing out, but making horrible mistakes. There was one woman who's story broke my heart and I remember hearing about her several years ago when it first happened. She forgot to drop her daughter off at day care and the daughter died from sitting in the back of the hot car for 8 hours. Another man forgot to turn off his wife's car that was sitting in their attached garage and she and their pets died of carbon monoxide poisoning. But, then there was a lady who took a year off from her family because she was so drained that getting away was the only way to get back to being her.

And that's where I began to think about me and my life. Lately, I have felt like I'm rushing all the time. I'm always looking at a clock and everything is always a countdown to something else. By the end of the day I'm exhausted and in the morning it's a struggle to get out the bed. I don't mind working full time while also building up my business and taking care of my family, but I don't want to wear myself thin either. So, I'm hoping that this retreat will be the first of many to help me become more balanced and more appreciative of the moment I'm living now.

I'm also going to allow myself the opportunity to let go of my frustrations, my disappointments, my imperfections, my hurt, my fears and my anger. I'm going to pray, meditate, I might even cry and just deal with me and how to keep myself sane. I can't do nothing for my family or my business if I'm a hot mess. We as parents, spouses and human beings give and give until we are on empty and I am drained. I , whom have always been a positive person, feel a little less hopeful about my relationships because I feel disconnected from everybody. Truth is, I'm disconnected from myself.

I don't know how soon this day of solitude will happen, but I can't wait. This past year was a good year, but it was me who stopped it from being great. I won't make the same mistake twice. I'm taking time out for me.

What would you do with a day all to yourself?