So, I'm sure you've heard of dog shaming: when a owner posts a picture of something crazy their pet did. I must admit some of the pics I've seen are kind of funny. Here are a few of my favorites:
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Pet shaming is harmless, they don't know what's going on and nobody's feelings are hurt (except the dog, maybe, but they get over it). But, you know what I can't stand and is when people Mom Shame. They make you feel guilty about not being able to do something because of responsibilities at home. It can cause people like me to Mom Shame myself sometimes off of pure guilt that I clearly am not the SuperMom they think I should be.
"But, Rhonda, nobody has taken a picture of you with a sign that reads, 'I let my kids wear the same jeans 3 times in a week as long as they don't stink and are not physically soiled'." No, they have not, thank God, but if you have heard or said any of the following you have been exposed to Mom Shaming:
"Oh, I didn't invite you because I figured you had to do something with your kids."
"You get take-out on Wednesdays? We usually save that for the weekends."
"My children don't eat gluten or monosaturated fats."
"We missed you at the last meeting."
"We were short staffed since you had to call in to take care of your sick child."
"If you can't be committed, then please re-evaluate your membership."
"Maybe you'll get to help out at the next fundraiser."
"Nick's mom let him have a phone."
"Please check one: Yes, I can help out for the school event in the morning, Yes, I can help out for the school event in the afternoon, No, I am unable to help out at this event or any other because I work."
Okay, so that last one was not worded exactly like that, but that's how I felt. There is a ton of guilt associated with being a mom, especially a working one who has dreams and goals of her own. I am not just a mother of two, I am a wife, a colleague, a dreamer, a writer, a songbird, a visionary, a counselor, and much much more. So while some of the shame is self-inflicted, I have to remind myself of all these complexities that create me. As long as my children are healthy, happy and satisfied, I can rest easy at night and could care less of what anyone thinks about my parenting abilities. Hashtag please go have several seats.
Has anyone every Mom Shamed you? How did you handle it?
Forever loving my BADD Kids,
Rhonda
